Kiss It Cancer

Sorry it's been a while. I did a lot of resting over the holiday weekend and that was a lot of work.

Pretty good news all around I think... the scans showed no lung damage. So, that is good news but it seems nobody can tell me what to do about this cough. My oncologist labeled it a 'hyper sensitivity' to allergies due to my chemo drugs. That's great and all...but how do we make it stop?

The CT scan also showed significant shrinkage in my neck and chest lymph nodes. So, that's a good sign that I'm responding to treatment. I'll need another PET scan to determine if/what cancer is left in my body but shrinkage in the black and white CT scan is a good start.

When told all this over the phone, I meekly asked "So, does that mean I don't need the last cycle of chemo???" The nurse abruptly told me that yes, I still needed chemo and then radiation to 'clean and tidy everything up.' Uggghhh.....I tried. Praying for a clean PET scan when treatment is over, but I'll take this as good news for now.

This evening I buckled Noah in the car seat and was about to take off to the bank when I remembered to get the mail. Funny timing.... because lo and behold (what does that term mean?) I had a card from my brother with a gift certificate to Shnucks for the cake I forementioned. With all my resting this weekend I had forgotten about my resolve to keep cake stocked in the fridge.

What a nice surprise! So, I went to the boring bank...crossed the street to Shnucks with the 2 year old in tow and marched up to the cake section. I could have gone for the boring, single person serving of cake...but no. I knew I needed at least a week's worth.



The cake lady looked about triple my age so...while I'm not usually shy... I just couldn't muster a 'Screw Cancer' or something even more heinous. It felt so disrespectful. So I said..."Can you please decorate the cake with 'Kiss It Cancer? I'm going to eat most of it myself and enjoy every bite.'

Well the little cake lady about had a meltdown...hugged me...rather clung to me... and pinched Noah's cheeks. He didn't know what to think. He kept chanting 'CAKE! CAKE! CAKE!' She went on about how she would pray for me and my battle against this disease. I told her I was fine...would probably end up just fine... and really just needed some cake and how sweet of her for the concern. She told me in her 15 years it was one of the more memorable cake salutations she had encountered.

Kiss it cancer. I mean it.

The checkout lady had a very similar response... and while I'm trained to counsel I really hadn't planned on whipping out a Freudian couch up at Shnucks to help these women through their grief. I was very, very appreciative of their responses...but ready to get out of there...skip dinner...and eat some cake. I told them it was going to be ok, and I have a lot to be thankful for!! Noah chanted 'CAKE!' the whole way home.

Thanks so much to brother Dave and his family for the unexpected gift and beautiful card. Thank you to my sister Carla for watching Noah over the holiday weekend so mommy could rest!

So- I'm sure my weight won't drop this week and that's ok. They've been getting on to me for that for months now (contrary to popular belief, nowadays most people GAIN weight from chemo because of all the steroids involved. Somehow I haven't- thank goodness. ONE perk out of this mess... please??)

Oh, I almost forgot. I cut my hair off. I was starting to remind myself of Beetlejuice- a round, mostly white scalp with dark whispy hair coming out here and there and just hanging out. Ridiculous. I just took scissors over the weekend and made it all even...which means it's all about 1/2 inch long. I think I look like a (fully) white, mostly bald Halle Berry. :) Ok, big stretch.

Treatment is Thursday... still two more since last week was canceled. It's a long, slow road but we're getting there.... thanks to great friends, family... and cake. :)

Love to all

Cathy